July 30, 2012

judging happiness

this was a secret on postsecret this week that triggered a thought in my head. 

often this is the way that the blog world works and i find that that is why people get so exhausted of blogging sometimes, of trying to 'keep up' with other bloggers and their perception of how their lives should be. looking to other people's lives to see how you should be living your own makes absolute no sense, so why do we so often find ourselves thinking 'i wish i looked like her', 'if i had her wardrobe i'd like the way i look a lot more', 'if i had her job/kids/partner (etc) i'd be happy'...removing these false ways of thinking is exactly what you need to start doing if you're not already.

i often thought (until only a few years ago actually) that if i lead a similar life to what my parents had/have then i would undoubtedly end up happy, because they are...and that's how life works, right? if i get a job at a school, if my future husband works for a great company like IBM (where my dad worked), if we have 2 kids (a boy & a girl) then we will live a comfortable life and be happy like my parents are...right?

wrong. emulating someone else's life, thinking that if you follow in their footsteps that your life will turn out the same way is so silly. it's a harsh reality sometimes though when you wake up and you're thinking 'that's not MY life...what am i doing'. it was one that took awhile for me. i mean, i knew i wasn't going to live the exact same life...naturally, but if it was similar that would equal happiness. i don't know, it's kind of a bizarre thought, looking back, but i guarantee that at one point in your life, you've looked to someone's life and thought something similar.

why can't we just be happy living our own lives? you can be inspired by someone else's life and turn that into motivation to make yours better, there's nothing wrong with that - in fact, i'd encourage it. if looking to someone's 'perfect life' gives you the motivation to look at your own and make the appropriate changes needed for you to be happy, that's great! just remember not to make the assumption that people's lives are perfect even though they are seemingly so. again, going back to the blog world...people put out there what they want you to perceive. they're more than likely not going to air their dirty laundry for all of blog world to see, and keep that in mind when you're looking at their 'perfect' photos and amazing lives through the eyes of their cameras.

basically, there are a million and one ways to make your life perfect for you. judging your life and comparing it to those of others is a complete waste of precious time. remember that...