April 3, 2012

the only constant is change

this quote has rang true for me since high school. i don't remember where i saw it first but i always thought that it really was the only truth. i had painted it on my wall at my parents place when i was 16 and i am constantly reminded on a day-to-day basis of how true it is. i feel like it is a better quote than 'everything happens for a reason' because sometimes that is really, really hard to find when shitty things happen. i prefer to think that change is constant and if you can deal with change than you can handle anything that is thrown your way.

i've always been drawn to blogs and bloggers who share...not every single detail of their life but if something has gone on and it's been bothersome or sad or emotional in some way, they talk about it. sometimes it feels really, really great to let things out, to share with other people. it almost feels like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders, when really all you've done is written a few paragraphs. people deal with different events and situations in many diverse ways, i've always been a fan of the written word. i 100% get this from my parents as they are both note-writers (both short notes & lists, as well as longer letters) and i feel like it was, in a way, instilled in me as a young girl. to this day, if i have a problem with someone or something, i prefer to write it down, get everything out that needs to be said and then talk it over...that's just what has always worked best for me.

so here i am...about to get real...

lately i've been feeling a little lost. lost is a pretty heavy word because it can mean many things to whoever is interpreting it. right now, lost means i feel as though i've lost control (of various aspects of my life, of myself, etc) i feel as though i've lost my sense of what i want to do in life and where i want to go, who i want to be, and what i want my life to look like in the future. so i guess lost right now is a pretty weighted word for me. i guess all of these things could also be looked at as exciting because i could open any door right now and see where it takes me, but at the same time, it is incredibly scary and slightly intimidating. when you feel like you have things somewhat figured out (at least for awhile) and then that plan gets changed, it leaves you feeling a little lost.

there are a ton of changes happening right now for me...more than i am used to handling at one time and i definitely get overwhelmed somewhat easily so i'm having a bit of a hard time dealing. i know that 'everything's going to be okay'...things always work themselves out, always and that is what i am looking forward to.

i feel like there are some big changes in the air,
i don't know what they look like, but i'm excited to find out!
the only constant in this world is change so we might as well embrace it and live it to the best of our abilities, right?